Your Honor, I Plead Grumpy With an Explanation

A nice short post, I promise ya.

Some little-known facts:

1.  I enjoy reading Hannibal Lecter fanfiction, and have even been known to write some in my day.

2.  A current labor of love is resurrecting a Lecterfic archive from about a decade ago.

3.  Hannibal Lecter's amour, Clarice Starling, likes to drink Jack Daniel's.

4.  Jack Daniel's brand contains an apostrophe, because the guy who founded the distillery had the surname of Daniel.            NOT DANIELS.

5.  If I had a dime for every fucking apostrophe I had to edit back into the name, I'd be a wealthy woman indeed.

End of rant.  Hope everyone had an enjoyable weekend. Click Here to Read More..

Two Rants for the Price of One

When I think of two things to be annoyed about between the grocery store and home, it's time to get on the soapbox.

Rant #1: Actually, this is a twofer, dealing with a couple of dumb usage mistakes that I frequently read and hear.

• When you are trying a different approach to something, you do not "take a different tact." The word is TACK -- from sailing, in which you adjust your sails to catch wind so as to sail in a different direction. I think people who use this are thinking of "tactic," which is, of course, another word for strategy or approach... and then they get the two mixed up and come out with "take a different tact." Noooooooo!
• When you are narrowing your aim toward a particular object, you do not "hone in on" it. You HOME in on it. Again, almost understandable. To hone is to sharpen, so yes, you want to sharpen and refine your sights to find exactly what you're looking for, but the word comes from HOMING pigeons, with their natural ability to find their way to a particular destination, and then later, such navigational aids as radar and sonar.
  

Rant #2: In between the grocery store and my house is a hospital. They apparently have adopted the same sort of no-smoking rules that most other medical facilities have nowadays -- NO smoking anywhere on the grounds. Fortunately, the place covers one small city block and the emergency entrance is quite close to the street. The smokers simply walk outside (taking care, presumably, not to get run over by a speeding ambulance) and smoke out on the public sidewalk.

Yes, smoking is legal and they have every right. I can understand a past, present or future patient smoking. Or the next of kin of a very sick person relieving their stress with a cigarette. I know how addictive nicotine is -- my mother lay dying in the hospital 20 years ago, with oxygen, and her last conversation with my father was an argument about why he couldn't bring in her cigarettes and let her smoke in bed!

But what annoys me, beyond all reason, is medical professionals who smoke. This evening I passed the "smokers' corner" and saw a woman in full surgical gear -- gown, cap, booties and even a mask, hanging around her neck -- puffing away.

Sorry, that's just gross. I can visualize the person doing what my husband does: Hold that last drag in the lungs as long as possible and then let it out just before going back inside the building. On goes the mask, and that grungy air gets exhaled into the fibers of the mask, just before the wearer leans down to examine that incision... Yech, ptui!!

I hate to encourage draconian employer policies, since we already have more than enough of those ... but medical professionals who smoke on the job? I'm sorry. I cannot muster up any degree of tolerance for that. Light up the second you clock out, if you must. Smoke all night at home, if you must. But please consider the workplace a sacred space and leave those damn things at home! If you can't go 8 hours without a smoke, you are in a very sad place and need to get some help.

This concludes the rant. Click Here to Read More..

RAAAAAAAANT

No matter how much I complain and scold those near & dear to me, they JUST WON'T STOP!

Why don't they listen???

WHAT FOOLS THESE MORTALS BE!

That was my dad's favorite quote. And no, it didn't originate with George Carlin, Andy Rooney, or Jay Leno. Try Shakespeare.

At least Dad got the attribution right. He was a high school dropout, but had he lived long enough to get familiar with the internet, I think he would have been appalled at some of the ignorance that gets spread far and wide by otherwise savvy, educated people.

I'm talking about URBAN LEGENDS. The ones you get in your e-mail from YOUR otherwise educated, informed friends.

The ones that tell you to throw away your dollar coins because those godless liberals trying to subvert our American way of life maliciously omitted "In God We Trust." If you believe this, and facts have any meaning to you, click here.

And they're still, STILL sending this one around. The more recent rationalization is, "Well now the gangs have heard about it and they've started doing it!"

The one and only time I got emotionally caught up in the "revelations" of an e-mail was back in '99, when I was still relatively new to the delights of the online community, and got this one in my in-box. Oh, those poor chickens! I was upset for a couple of days until I finally tracked down the refutation. I don't know if they had snopes.com back then, but they do now, and anyone who doesn't check the veracity of these stories will find themselves losing points with me.

Even Snopes itself gets caught up in this crap, so if someone e-mails you a fascinating rumor, please, please, PLEASE check it out for yourself first, before you cram somebody's already full inbox. And make yourself look like a gullible stooge!

And it's not just me.



Click Here to Read More..

Driving and Griping

I went to see Wally over the weekend. As far as that went, it was a good time. We enjoyed seeing each other and spending time, though Wally had to work part of a day, which left me to my own devices. Not bad, overall. He will do fine where he is, providing he doesn't get passive-aggressive and self-sabotaging and screw it all up for himself.

Good got-damn, it was cold in that Northern state! Even Wally has begun to lose his love for the higher latitudes and is looking forward to attending college out west where it's warm.

Two main gripes.

1. An idiot I met at the hotel. We had to move our cars because repairs were going on during the weekend. Another guest complained about having to move it so far from his room and expressed a wish (loudly) that "some asshole won't come along and give me a ticket..." He had moved his car next to mine and apparently saw my out-of-state plate. In an even louder voice, aimed at me, he said "I tell it like it is! I'm not from the south!" The appropriate response, which I wish I'd been quick enough to think of right then, is, "Well, bless your heart!"
2. All the many Darwin Award contestants on the interstates. People who take up residence in the left lane and then do the speed limit deserve the death penalty.

That's all. Back home, and back to the usual routine.

Oh -- this wouldn't be complete without some moaning about money!

I'm seriously overdrawn, with over $400 in overdraft fees! If it weren't for the frickin fees, it wouldn't be all that bad. I may call the bank and see if maybe they could take off a couple of them. But first I have to wait until it settles -- there are still some pending items. Then it will be payday, which will help a bit.

I got the registration done for the conference in June - no one said anything about having to send in money so I'll assume my sponsors are going to take care of that. Great! I've already got my flight and hotel room. Click Here to Read More..